Robots (2005)

Share this quote on facebook Just stick with me, kid. I know this town like the back of my hand. (sees something on his hand) Hey, that's new! (gets blown off his feet by a giant hammer)

Share this quote on facebook Say hello to my dimpled friend!

Share this quote on facebook See a need, fill a need!

Share this quote on facebook You can shine no matter what you're made of!

Share this quote on facebook Why be you when you can be new?

Share this quote on facebook (After beating Bigweld unconscious with his telephone) Oh my gosh, I'm as crazy as my mother!

Share this quote on facebook (Rodney has just arrived at Bigweld Industries; he stares at the front gate in awe)
Tim: Yoo-hoo! Excuse me! Can I help you?
Rodney: Sorry, I … hey! You're Tim from the TV show!
Tim: That's me!
Rodney: Well, hey, Tim. Who closed the gate? It's never supposed to be -
Tim: Yeah, okay. What do you want?
Rodney: Hm? Oh. I'd like to see Mr. Bigweld. I'm an inventor. (he quickly shows Wonderbot to Tim)
Tim: Well, why didn't you say so? Stand back.
(Tim opens the gate; Rodney stares in amazement at what he sees)
Rodney: Thanks. (he starts to go in, but the door suddenly closes) WHAT?!
Tim: (laughing) I gotcha! Y'see, because you were all excited, and then BOOM! (laughs again; Rodney glares) Alright, I had my laugh. Go on in.
Rodney: (resuming his entry before the door closes again) Whoa … hey!
Tim: (laughing hysterically) Now, that's funny! A second time! What?! You really think I'm gonna let you in! But I'm not. Sorry, kid. Nobody gets in. Company rules.
Rodney: Company ru- well, then how do they hire new inventors?
Tim: They don't. Those days are over. My advice … hm, come back two years ago, then the job is yours. (laughs hysterically)

Share this quote on facebook (The Bigweld Industries executives are gathered in the meeting room, watching a clip of The Bigweld Show)
Bigweld: (audio) So, remember, whether a bot is made of new parts, old parts or spare parts, you can shine no matter what you're made of. (the clip stops)
Ratchet: My goodness. What a remarkable legacy. Concern for the common robot. You don't come across old-fashioned values like that anymore , friends. And for good reason. THERE'S NO MONEY IN IT!!! Hello! Memo to Bigweld: we're not a charity! That's why old Fat-face no longer sits in the big chair. He's a relic! So I don't want to hear another (in a whiny voice) "Where's Bigweld?" (imitates a baby whining)
Chairman: We'll see him next month at the Bigweld Ball! He always goes to that. (Ratchet pushes a button which makes the chairman fall into a pit)

Share this quote on facebook (Rodney has been dumped out of Bigweld Industries by the security guards; magnetic particles land on his face)
Tim: So, how'd it go?
Rodney: (struggling to get the particles off his face) What the heck is ... going on around here? Some ... some highly ... polished jerk is sitting ... in Bigweld's chair!
Tim: Hm. And you're sitting on the sidewalk. Magnetized! (laughs)
Rodney: Listen, I'll be back, and I'm gonna get to the bottom of this! (strenuously walks off)
Tim: Boy, when you pick a lost cause, you really commit! Where do they make dreamers like you? GET LOST, FREAK!'

Share this quote on facebook Crank: Ugh. What's the use? There's nothing left.
Lug: Hey, Diesel, I found you a voice box. (Diesel puts the voice box in his mouth; starts imitating a Japanese sport announcer until the chip falls out of him) Uh ... here's another one. (Diesel starts barking like a dog)
Crank: That's no good. Give me that! (He attempts to take it out of Diesel, but Diesel just growls at him)
Lug: (sighs) I can never find parts in my size. (Fender's head suddenly flies into the basket; Diesel barks) What is it, boy? (finds Fender's head) Hey, Fender, have you lost weight?
Crank: "Lost weight"?! Look at - will you look at - he's a head, in a basket! We're doomed, I knew it. We're doomed.
Fender: Yeah, will you shut up, you neurotic nut? Why, I'd ... I'd smack you if I had a hand. (his body conveniently comes bouncing off the walls) Well, speaking of the devil, here I come. (his body lands) Ow! Dang it!
Piper: (emerging from a nearby recycling bin with a discarded Wonderbot) Whoa, check this out! Who would throw away such a cute little doodad? (Wonderbot whimpers) Aw, don't be scared ...
Rodney: (offscreen) Hey, that's mine!
Fender: That's him! That's the guy! I would know that face! I know that face, and I know that foot! (he realizes his hand is pointing to his own body instead of Rodney's) Psst! He's over there, moron. (his hand points to Rodney's body) That's the perpetrator! He knocked my head off! You want another piece of me?!
Piper: Alright, buster! If you think you can mess with my big brother, you're ... (is distracted by Rodney's appearance) you're kind of cute.
Crank: Piper, would you behave yourself? Now, come on. Let's get Fender fixed ... again.
Piper: (handing Wonderbot back to Rodney) Here's your ... thingumabob. By the way ... the name's Piper. Rhymes with "viper". (hisses flirtatiously) See you round. (she suddenly trips over, but gets up and adjusts herself)
Fender: We've told you a hundred times, (with his hand) don't talk to strange men. Thank you, Manuel.
Piper: I talk to you. Who's stranger than that?

Share this quote on facebook Jackhammer: I got good news, and I got bad news.
Fender: What's the bad news?
Jackhammer: I checked the stock book. As of today, they're no longer making parts for your model. You have been officially outmoded.
Fender: [calmly] Outmoded? Well, that's fine. [Bursts in anger] WHAT'S THE GOOD NEWS?!
Jackhammer: Well, when we had your parts...THEY WERE ON SALE! (laughs, Fender laughs and then cries)
Fender: How could this happen to me?! I'm practically a kid!
Jackhammer: Jeez, look, pull yourself together. All you need is an upgrade.

Share this quote on facebook Rodney Copperbottom: Hey, Fender.
Fender: Hm? [Rodney does arm farts] YEAH, BABY!!!! LET IT RIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[Rodney and Fender are doing arm farts]
Crank: Hey, guys, come on. What are you, three years old? This is how a man does it.
[Crank does arm farts]
Piper: You guys are SO gross! Besides, this is how you do it.
[Piper does arm farts]
Aunt Fanny: Hey kids, get a load of this!
[does HUGE fart and sighs with relief; Everyone is grossed out]
Rodney: Open a window!
Piper: Aunt Fanny, we were using our arms! Eeeeewwwww!
Aunt Fanny: Oh.....excuse me.
Crank: Ugh, light a match!
Lamppost: Lady... please! See a doctor! [passes out]

Share this quote on facebook [an angry mob of outmodes gathers at the front of Jack Hammer’s store]
Jack Hammer: Sorry, folks! All sold out! Nothing but upgrades from here on in!
Female Robot: [angry] But I like myself just the way I am! [Her light bulb nose breaks] Uh!
Male Robot #1: We can't afford upgrades!
Male Voice: This is unfair!
Male Robot #2: [shouting] Let's get him! [A male robot attempts to throw a trashcan, but it is actually a robot.]
Trashcan Bot: Hey, hey, hey! Hey, what are you doing?! Don't throw me! [Rodney and the Rusties join in the commotion] Hey, isn’t that the guy who fixed Fender’s neck?!
Male Robot #3: Yeah, that guy fixes bots!
Jack Hammer: Yeah! That kid can help you!
Fender: [to Rodney] Brace yourself, you’re about to get very popular.

Share this quote on facebook Broken-Arm Bot: Hey, could you look at my arm?
Rodney: [the arm comes off as he takes it] Uh … nice grip.
Broken-Arm Bot: LIKE IRON!
Tire Bot: I can't get rid of this spare tire!
Lost Mind Bot: I am losing my mind!
Tammy: [crying] I didn't take good care of my battery and I'm bleeding to death!
Fender: Back off, back off! HE'S GOT HIS OWN DREAMS THAT WON'T COME TRUE!!!
[Rodney and Fender look at the departing delivery van and notice Ratchet’s slogan, “Why be you?”]
Rodney: See a need, fill a need. [turns to the crowd walking away] Wait! [dons his spanners] Who wants to get fixed?!
[the crowd cheers, except for a dog, who whimpers]

Share this quote on facebook [Rodney and Fender arrive at the Bigweld Ball dressed as rich robots]
Tim: Uh, can I help you?
Fender: (in a foreign accent) I think maybe you can. This is Count Roderic Von Broken-zipper! Formerly Count Velcro. (Tim stammers) Where are the trumpets?! (Tim stammers some more) We were promised trumpets to announce the Count's arrival! (to Rodney) I'm so sorry, your Grace. Beat me until you're happy. (Rodney slaps Fender on the face) He's happy, and I'm not feeling too bad myself!
(they walk in)
Tim: (clears his throat) Let me... uh.... You're not on the list.
Fender: We're what?! (to Rodney) Once again. (Rodney slaps Fender again) Thank you. (to Tim) Fine! WE WILL GO!! YOU WILL EXPLAIN TO YOUR SUPERIORS WHY WE WERE NOT ABLE TO ATTEND YOUR LITTLE LUAU, YOUR BARN DANCE, WHATEVER IT IS! BUT WE'RE LEAVING, IN A HUFF!!!
[Rodney and Fender start to walk away]
Tim: No, no, no! Please, go right in! In fact, would the Count like to hit me?
Fender: The Count hit you?! The arrogance of some people! I will hit you on his behalf! (hits Tim, knocking him off the booth)
Tim: Thank you, your Grace! (His pants fall down; a nearby woman faints)

Share this quote on facebook Ratchet: [on the phone] No, no. Tell him I'm not here. Tell him anything, just don't let him in!
Bigweld: [charges into the office] Ratchet! [Ratchet shrieks and hides in Bigweld's chair] I'll come right to the point!
Ratchet: What happened? Run out of dominoes? I'll send you some more.
Bigweld: You're fired!
Ratchet: Fired? On what grounds? This company has never been more profitable.
Bigweld: [shoves him out of his chair] Profits, schmofits. Now, get out!
Ratchet: No, wait, please! Listen to me! You can’t do this to me! This job is my life! It means everything to me. You don't know what I've done to get here. The lies I've told! The lives I've ruined! This isn't helping me.
[cut to Bigweld calling the security on the phone]
Bigweld: [to the operator on the phone] Get me security!
Ratchet: Wait, please! Can I just make one more heartfelt plea?
Bigweld: Okay, what did you wanna say?
Ratchet: That! [whacks Bigweld on the head with the phone] Oh my gosh, I'm as crazy as my mother! [Bigweld groans; Ratchet hits him again]

Share this quote on facebook Robot on truck: Hey! Get out of the way!
Herb: Hey, hey! I'm going to be a dad!

Share this quote on facebook Rodney: Mr. Bigweld, are you okay?
Bigweld: I'm the prettiest girl at the Harvest Moon Ball!
Rodney: I'll take that as a "no!"

Share this quote on facebook [Bigweld has been taken hostage by Madame Gasket and is a few steps away from being incinerated]
Bigweld: Gasket, you're a sick, twisted, evil robot.
Madame Gasket: [flattered; in a sing-song voice and fluttering her eyelashes] I try.

Share this quote on facebook Madame Gasket: Who are these losers?
Fender: We, sir...
Madame Gasket: I'm a woman.
Crank: Ouch. (Diesel's eye lenses break)
Fender: (with Scottish accent) We've come to rescue our friend, you evil bucket of bolts! And you will be defeated by the very outmodes that you scorn and detest!
Crank: Yeah, 'cause there's seven of us, and only one of you. (Madame Gasket's minions appear) Uh, whoa, whoa …
Fender: There’s seven of us, and... (counts how many minions there are) eight, nine...
Crank: Uh, did you count that one?
Fender: I think so. COULD YOU ALL STOP MOVING AROUND?!? THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING!!! I THINK I COUNTED ONE OF YOU TWICE!!!

Share this quote on facebook [Piper has just showed up unexpectedly to help the others fight Madame Gasket and her minions]
Piper: Did I miss the butt-whuppin'?
Everyone: Uh... no.
Crank: Matter of fact, you're a little bit early.

Share this quote on facebook Rodney: This is our moment to shine, and this is what you show that you're really made of!
Fender: In my case, it's a rare metal called "Afraidium." It's yellow, and tastes like chick-eeeeeennnnn … [Fender clucks like a chicken and promptly lays an egg.] [breathlessly] Oh-ooh-ooh! I didn't know I could do that!

Share this quote on facebook Tin Man: Now I'm sorry I've got a heart, because it's aching.

Share this quote on facebook [Herb is doing a poor job of playing the instrument Rodney gave him]
Crank: Well, there goes our happy ending.
Fender: No – it’s a fusion of jazz and funk. It’s called junk.

Share this quote on facebook You can shine no matter what you're made of.

Share this quote on facebook The biggest comedy ever assembled!

Share this quote on facebook Repair for adventure!