Col. Steve Trevor
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The truth is, I'm really not such a pig. No, that's not the truth. I am a pig. A womanizer. Been one for a long time now. Sometimes I think it's because I don't wanna be hurt. Well, not again. This macho bravado, it's all a facade. Wait, why am I telling you this? [
Notices his foot's caught in the lasso of truth] God, I hope you Amazons can't mass-produce this thing.
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[
after Diana shows a girl how to swordfight] That was sweet. Teaching her to disembowel her playmates like that.
Ares
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How will you stop me now that my powers rival that of any god? I am as strong as Hercules. As fast as Hermes. And now, like Hades, I wield dominion over the dead which allows me to unleash my own worst curse upon you people. Amazon dead, I command you to come to your lord. Slaughter your sisters.
Dialogue
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[
first lines]
Ares: You seem as eager to meet me on the battlefield as you once did in the bedroom, Hippolyta.
Hippolyta: I only hope you prove more skilled in this arena, Ares.
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Hippolyta: Here the true nature of men is laid bare. What other depraved thoughts must you be thinking?
Col. Steve Trevor: God, your daughter's got a nice rack.
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President's Advisor: Mr. President, the threat has been neutralized.
The President: How?
President's Advisor: It seems by a group of armored supermodels.
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Artemis: [
Wonder Woman has just flown off for "Man's World"] We should not have let her go.
Hippolyta: I don't see how we could have stopped her.
Artemis: I could have shot her in the leg... Not near an artery, of course.
Hippolyta: You are the soul of thoughtfulness, Artemis.
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Artemis: I must confess, my queen. It feels like the first day of school.
Hippolyta: And you could not find a bigger sword, Artemis?
Artemis: Sword? This is but my dagger.
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Wonder Woman: I didn't need you to save me. I needed you to stop Ares.
Steve Trevor: Hey, if it weren't for me, you wouldn't be here right now.
Wonder Woman: I'm an Amazon, Steve. We're prepared from birth to give our lives in battle. I knew what the consequences were going in to this mission. I bet you would have acted differently, if I were a man.
Steve Trevor: Oh, playing the sex card again, are you? You know what? I've had just about enough of listening to you go on about how terrible men are.
Wonder Woman: Does the truth hurt, Steve?
Steve Trevor: News flash: The Amazons ain't so perfect either. You act brave, but cutting yourselves off from the outside world was cowardly. Not to mention stupid. Like less communication between men and women is what the world needed.
Wonder Woman: How dare you?
Steve Trevor: No! I'm not done. You met your first man, what, like 15 minutes ago. And you think you have us all figured out. Well, I'm sorry, but not everything a man does is to further some misogynistic agenda. We don't hold doors open or pull out chairs for women because we're trying to keep you down. And I didn't save you because I thought were some damsel in distress. I saved you because... Because I care about you, Diana. And I'm not gonna abandon a friend in need, man or woman.
Wonder Woman: You should have saved the world, and not me...
Steve Trevor: Maybe I figured the world's not worth saving if you're not in it.
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Steve Trevor: So the queen's kid, you know, the hot chick?
Artemis: Princess Diana.
Steve Trevor: Yeah, her. So, what's her deal?
Artemis: Her deal is that I will personally castrate you if you come within five yards of her.
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Col. Steve Trevor: Here, let me get that for you... [
opens a taxi for Diana]
Diana: I can lift weights, I can handle car doors.
Col. Steve Trevor: Sweetheart, we discussed this.
Diana: Oh, yeah. Sorry. [
puts on a playful act] Oh thank you, Mr Man. You're such a gentleman..
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Alexa: There's a quote in which I find the courage to face the unknown. "As a rock on the seashore he standeth firm, and the dashing of the waves disturbeth him not. In the instant..."
Persephone: [
stabs Alexa in the back] Yes, I know the quote well. It had aided me much in recent days. Shall I finish it? "In the instant of danger, the courage of his heart sustaineth him and the steadiness of his mind beareth him out."
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Princess Diana: Surrender. You cannot escape.
Steve Trevor: Oh, I don't know about that, angel. I've made a hobby out of fleeing chasing women.
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Hippolyta: You were given a life of peace and beauty!
Persephone: And denied one of families and children. Yes Hippolyta, the Amazons are warriors... but we are women too.
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Artemis: I assure you, Alexa, a sharp blade and a strong arm will do more good now than a quote from some dead philosopher.
Alexa: I do not belong on this killing field, sister. I am no warrior.
Artemis: That you are not. But if you cannot fight like an Amazon, you will at least die like one.
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Wonder Woman: It's all true, isn't it, Steve? Everything my mother warned me about man's world is true. She even told me you'd try to seduce me, and I, like a fool, told her, "For now, let's only expect the best from the pilot." You tried to get me drunk. As if you could out drink an Amazon, you pathetic lightweight.
Col. Steve Trevor: [
Sees thugs approaching] Oh, crap.
Wonder Woman: [Unaware of the thugs] Yes, I knew exactly what you were trying to do. And please don't use that language around me.
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Col. Steve Trevor: [
being interrogated with the Lasso of Truth] I don't have to put up with this crap!
Hippolyta: We are unfamiliar with this particular idiom. What does 'crap' mean?
Col. Steve Trevor: [
considers] No, forget I even said it. [
tightens the Lasso] [
struggles] It's another word for excrement. You happy now, lady? [
looks shocked]
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Hades: You're early, nephew.
Ares: Not that I don't cherish your company, my dear uncle, but I'm afraid I'm only visiting today.
Hades: You are here for a favor.
Ares: I am.
Hades: Perhaps, then, you can enlighten me as to why you think I would remove your bands. Is it because I've longed for a return of your power-crazed ways? Or maybe, I wish to see you act again without regard for your divine brothers and sisters.
[growing angry] Or is it simply because I am so easily manipulated and, like a dog, will obey any command?!
Ares: It is simplicity itself. Once these bands are removed, I will wage a war against humanity the likes of which this world has never seen. Its populace will choke on death. And you will be flooded with more servants to glorify you than you will possibly know what to do with.
Cast