Home on the Range (2004)

Share this quote on facebook [narrating] Home on the range. Once upon a time, I had a home on the range. But not anymore. Well, it's no use cryin' over spilled milk. Speakin' of which, that's me. I'm a "cow". Yeah, they're real. Quit staring. I'm sort of between homes right now. I lost my old place thanks to the meanest bunch of cattle rustlers in the west, Alameda Slim and the Willie Brothers gang. [Alameda Slim uses his yodeling and stole all of Abner's herd of cattle] Somehow, they stole the whole herd right out from under our noses and then they disappeared without a trace. [Abner checks out that his herd of cattle is gone, but she was the only one that was here] After that, poor old Abner couldn't afford to keep the place... or me, either, for that matter. Well, no matter how bad things get, there's probably somebody worse off. [She sees Lucky Jack running with the rattle snake still biting his whole head, then he runs into a cactus which fling off the rattle snake] That guy, for instance.

Share this quote on facebook She'd better hurry up around that mountain, 'cause I can't take this much longer.

Share this quote on facebook If that's the sheriff's office, this town rocks!

Share this quote on facebook All right, what part of "cover me" did we not understand?

Share this quote on facebook We just they round circles.

Share this quote on facebook Maggie, for the last time, I will not be roped into this scheme!

Share this quote on facebook We're looking for a cattle rustler named Alameda Slim.

Share this quote on facebook He must be takin' stupid lessons from that buffalo. [Junior snorts down his neck] Uh-oh.

Share this quote on facebook I wouldn't help you bossy bovines if my life DEPENDED ON IT!

Share this quote on facebook Molly: Oh, it's Buck!.

Share this quote on facebook Vulture: You sure, we can wait around!.

Share this quote on facebook Vulture: False alarm, Clem!.

Share this quote on facebook Clem the Vulture: Rodger, dodger, out like the wind, good luck!

Share this quote on facebook The Donkey: Hey, Tommy, have fun on that cattle drive!!!

Share this quote on facebook Tommy the Ox: Alright, then! Mhm!.

Share this quote on facebook Grace: [singing mountains come]

Share this quote on facebook Sheriff Sam Brown: It's Alameda Slim!

Share this quote on facebook Sheriff Sam Brown: Alameda Slim, you're under arrest!

Share this quote on facebook [The cowboys are attacked by the Willie Brothers]
Mrs. Calloway: What was that?
Grace: That must be Slim and the Willies.
Longhorns: [freaking out] Slim and the Willies!
Bob: Don't worry, darlin', I'll protect you.
Mrs. Calloway: You have exactly two seconds to remove your hoof...before I snap it off at the knee.
Bob: Sorry, ma'am. I thought you were the blonde—
[She whacks him, sending him to the ground]

Share this quote on facebook [Mrs. Calloway saves Maggie from drowning during the flash flood and drags her to a nearby rock on the shore]
Maggie: No! Come on, girls, we can't give up!
Mrs. Calloway Maggie, that's enough. The minute this lets up, we're heading straight home to Patch of Heaven.
Maggie: But what about catching Slim and collecting the reward?
Mrs. Calloway: We never had a prayer of catching Slim in the first place. This whole ridiculous plan is just so you can get revenge on those cattle rustlers.
Maggie: Hey! For your information, duchess, this whole ridiculous plan is about us saving our farm.
Mrs. Calloway: Huh. Our farm might've had a fighting chance until you came along.
Maggie: What's that supposed to mean?!
Mrs. Calloway: Strutting around with your vulgar show-cow behavior.
Maggie: Look, I was just having...
Mrs. Calloway: Wasting our time on your foolish plans. Through the years, Patch of Heaven has survived every hardship that nature can dish out, but you, Maggie, are the biggest catastrophe to ever hit our farm.
Maggie: Well, if that's the way you feel about it, maybe we should just go our separate ways.
Mrs. Calloway: Now, that's the first good idea you've ever had.
Maggie: Fine.
Mrs. Calloway: Fine.
Maggie: Fine!
Mrs. Calloway: Fine! [Sits down as Grace looks sadly at the two of them]
Maggie: Yeah. Fine. It's not like your farm was ever gonna feel like home to me anyways.

Share this quote on facebook Sheriff Sam Brown: Alameda Slim, you're under arrest! [Slim muffled "Let go or get us killed!"]
Grace: Nobody messes with pearls, girls. [to Buck]

Share this quote on facebook Sam J. Levine as the Willie Brothers

Share this quote on facebook Charlie Dell as Ollie the Pig

Share this quote on facebook Keaton Savage, Ross Smanteris and Bobby Block as Piggies

Share this quote on facebook Peter Siragusa as Clem the Vulture

Share this quote on facebook John Sandford as Rooster

Share this quote on facebook Mickie McGowan as Hens