The Big Short (2015)

Share this quote on facebook And I'm getting madder and madder and I ask this guy how he sleeps at night knowing he's ripping off working people and he just leaves. He doesn't say a word. He just walks away from the lunch. So am I the fucked up one, or is he?

Share this quote on facebook So, mortgage bonds are dog shit, and CDO's are dog shit wrapped up in cat shit?

Share this quote on facebook The banks have given us 25% interest rates on credit cards. They have screwed us on student loans that we can never get out from under. Then this guy walks into my office and says those same banks got greedy, they lost track of the market, and I can profit off of their stupidity? Fuck yeah, I want him to be right!

Share this quote on facebook [Regarding Vennett] I can't hate him. He's so transparent in his self-interest, that I kind of respect him. Would I buy a car from him? No.

Share this quote on facebook We live in an era of fraud in America. Not just in banking, but in government, education, religion, food, even baseball... What bothers me isn't that fraud is not nice. Or that fraud is mean. For fifteen thousand years, fraud and short-sighted thinking have never, ever worked. Not once. Eventually, you get caught, things go south. When the hell did we forget all that? I thought we were better than this, I really did.

Share this quote on facebook I'm going to try to find moral redemption at the roulette table.

Share this quote on facebook Holy shit. All this time I've been trying to figure out who it is I'm betting against, and it's Morgan-Stanley. Which is me.

Share this quote on facebook We're going to wait and we're going to wait and we're going to wait until they feel the pain until they start to bleed.

Share this quote on facebook They knew. They knew the taxpayers would bail them out. They weren't being stupid, they just didn't care.

Share this quote on facebook I have a feeling in a few years people are going to be doing what they always do when the economy tanks. They will be blaming immigrants and poor people.

Share this quote on facebook [Last line of the movie] Okay..sell it all.

Share this quote on facebook Lawrence, I don't know how to be sarcastic.

Share this quote on facebook I may have been early, but I'm not wrong.

Share this quote on facebook I guess when someone's wrong, they never...never know how.

Share this quote on facebook [Final letter to his investors] I met my wife through Match.com. My profile said, "I am a medical student with only one eye, an awkward social manner, and $145,000 in student loans." She wrote back, "You're just what I've been looking for." She meant "honest", so let me be honest. Making money is not like what I thought it would be. This business kills the part of life that is essential, the part that has nothing to do with business. For the past two years, my insides have felt like they've been eating themselves. All the people that I respected won't talk to me anymore, except through lawyers. People want an authority to tell them how to value things, but they choose this authority not based on facts or results. They choose it because it feels authoritative and familiar. And I am not, nor ever have been, "familiar." So...so I have come to the sullen realization that I must close down the fund. Sincerely, Michael J. Burry, M.D.

Share this quote on facebook The NSA has a $52 billion budget and the ability to monitor tens of millions of calls a second. You think they're not using it?

Share this quote on facebook If we're right, people lose homes. People lose jobs. People lose retirement savings, people lose pensions. You know what I hate about fucking banking? It reduces people to numbers. Here's a number - every 1% unemployment goes up, 40,000 people die, did you know that?

Share this quote on facebook Just...don't fucking dance.

Share this quote on facebook I'm trying to sell $200 million worth of securities...in a pub...smells like sheep.

Share this quote on facebook You guys said you wanted to be rich, now you're rich.

Share this quote on facebook [Opening monologue] In the late '70s, banking wasn't a job you went into to make large sums of money. It was a fucking snooze, filled with losers. Like selling insurance or accounting. And if banking was boring, then the bond department at the bank was straight up comatose. We all know about bonds. You give 'em to your snot-nosed kid when he turns 15; maybe, when he's 30, he makes a hundred bucks. Boring. That is until Lewis Ranieri came on the scene at Salomon Brothers. You might not know who he is, but he changed your life more than Michael Jordan, the iPod, and YouTube put together. You see, Lewis didn't know it yet, but he had already changed banking forever with one simple idea.

Share this quote on facebook The money came raining down, and for the first time, the banker went from the country club to the strip club. Pretty soon, stocks and savings were almost inconsequential. They were doing $50, $100, $200 billion in mortgage bonds and dozens of other securities a year, and America barely noticed as its number one industry became boring old banking. And then, one day, almost 30 years later, in 2008, it all came crashing down. In the end, Lewis Ranieri's mortgage-backed security mutated into a monstrosity that collapsed the whole world economy, and none of the experts or leaders or talking heads had a clue it was coming. I'm guessing most of you still don't really know what happened. Yeah, you got a soundbite you repeat so you don't sound dumb, but come on. But, there were some who saw it coming. While the whole world was having a big old party, a few outsiders and weirdos saw what no one else could. Not me. I'm not a weirdo, I'm pretty fucking cool, but we'll meet again later. These outsiders saw the giant lie at the heart of the economy, and they saw it by doing something the rest of the suckers never thought to do: They looked.

Share this quote on facebook Let me put it this way: I'm standing in front of a burning house, and I'm offering you fire insurance on it.

Share this quote on facebook Is this America's angriest hedge fund?

Share this quote on facebook Now their foot's on fire, they think their steak is done, and you're surprised?

Share this quote on facebook Tell me the difference between stupid and illegal and I'll have my wife's brother arrested.

Share this quote on facebook "And Caesar wept, for there were no more worlds to conquer."

Share this quote on facebook I'm JACKED! I'M JACKED TO THE TITS!

Share this quote on facebook [Looking at his bonus check of $47 million] So, I was right. I took a rash of shit for 2 years, but I was right and everyone was wrong. And, yeah, I got a big bonus for it. Sue me, you know? It's a lot of money, I know. I can feel you judging me. That's palpable. But, hey, I never said I was the hero of this story.

Share this quote on facebook Margot Robbie: [In a bubble bath with a glass of champagne] Basically, Lewis Ranieri's mortgage bonds were amazingly profitable for the big banks. They made billions and billions on their 2% fee they got for selling each of these bonds. But then, they started running out of mortgages to put in them. After all, there are only so many homes and so many people with good enough jobs to buy them, right? So, the banks started filling these bonds with riskier and riskier mortgages. [Butler pours more champagne into her glass] (Thank you, Benjamin) That way, they can keep that profit machine churning, alright? By the way, these risky mortgages are called "subprime." So, whenever you hear the word "subprime," think "shit." Our friend, Michael Burry, found out that these mortgage bonds that were supposedly 65% AAA, were actually just, mostly, full of shit, so now, he's going to "short" the bonds, which means "to bet against." Got it? Good...[Takes a sip of champagne] Now, fuck off.

Share this quote on facebook Cynthia Baum: The therapist called. You did it again!

Share this quote on facebook Cynthia Baum: You're not a saint. Saints don't live on Park Avenue.

Share this quote on facebook Charlie Geller: Will you listen to me?! This, like, the end of capitalism! This is like the Dark Ages all over again!

Share this quote on facebook Pub patron: [To Ben] Are you a drug dealer or a banker? Because if you're a banker, you can fuck right off!

Share this quote on facebook Jamie Shipley: This level of criminality is unprecedented, even for fucking Wall Street!

Share this quote on facebook Jared Vennett: [pulling blocks from a Jenga tower] As, zero. Bs, zero. Double Bs, zero. Triple Bs, zero... [the tower topples] And then that happens.
Mark Baum: What is that?
Jared Vennett: That's America's housing market.
[Baum's team stares in utter shock]
Jared Vennett: Thank you.
Analyst: Fuckin' A, Jared.
Jared Vennett: Shut your fuckin' mouth.

Share this quote on facebook Danny Moses: You're completely sure of the math?
Jared Vennett: Look at him, that's my quant.
Mark Baum: Your what?
Jared Vennett: My quantitative. My math specialist. Look at him, you notice anything different about him? Look at his face.
Mark Baum: That's pretty racist.
Jared Vennett: Look at his eyes, I'll give you a hint, his name is Yang. He won a national math competition in China, he doesn't even speak English! Yeah I'm sure of the math.
Jiang: [To the camera] Actually, my name's "Jiang", and I do speak English. Jared likes to say I don't, because he thinks it makes me seem more "authentic." And I placed 2nd in that national math competition.

Share this quote on facebook Mark Baum: It's time to call bullshit.
Vinnie Daniel: Bullshit on what?
Mark Baum: Every-fucking-thing.

Share this quote on facebook Mark Baum: I don't get it. Why are they confessing?
Danny Moses: They're not confessing.
Porter Collins: They're bragging.

Share this quote on facebook Mark Baum: [on the phone] Ok, I want you to walk back in there and very calmly, very politely tell the risk-assessors to fuck-off.
Vinnie Daniel: [Walks into the room] Gentlemen, I just spoke with Mark Baum...he says to 'fuck off'.

Share this quote on facebook Vinnie Daniel: What's the ABX at?
Porter Collins: What's ABX?
Vinnie Daniel: It tracks mortgage bond value. Go back to sleep.

Share this quote on facebook Bruce Miller: As some of you may know, Bear Stearns has just received a loan from JP Morgan. Of course, we're gonna have to wait and see how the markets react, but that should lay to rest any concerns about the bank's health.
Debate host: Now, I take it you have no plans to sell your $200 million in Bear stock?
Bruce Miller: No, as a matter of fact, when we're done here, I'll probably go out and buy some more. [Crowd lightly chuckles]
Debate host: For the opposing view, Mr. Baum.
Mark Baum: I got to stand for this. [Takes the microphone and stands] Okay, hi. My firm's thesis is pretty simple. Wall Street took a good idea, Lewis Ranieri's mortgage bond, and turned it into an atomic bomb of fraud and stupidity that's on its way to decimating the world economy.
Bruce Miller: How do you really feel? [Crowd laughs]
Mark Baum: I'm glad you still have a sense of humor; I wouldn't if I were you. Now, anyone who knows me knows that I have no problem telling someone they're wrong...
Danny Moses: [In the crowd, looking at Bear Stearns' stock price live on his Blackberry, showing Vinny and Porter; they speak in hushed whispers] (Bear Stearns is denying rumors of liquidity problems...Holy fuck, it's 39 now!)
Mark Baum: ...is not so enjoyable. We live in an era of fraud in America. Not just in banking, but in government, education, religion, food, even baseball. What bothers me isn't that fraud is not nice or that fraud is mean. It's that, for 15,000 years, fraud and short-sighted thinking have never, ever worked. Not once.
Danny Moses: (Jesus, Bear at 37. Bear's at 37.)
Mark Baum: Eventually, people get caught, things go south.
Vinny Daniel: (Plummeting.)
Danny Moses: (It's fucking plummeting, man.)
Mark Baum: When the hell did we forget all that? I thought we were better than this, I really did. And the fact that we're not doesn't make me feel alright and superior. It makes me feel...sad.
Danny Moses: (Every time I fucking hit "refresh", it's dropping, man. Every time.)
Mark Baum: And as much fun as it is to watch pompous, dumb Wall Streeters be wildly wrong, [To Miller] and you are wrong, sir, I just know, that at the end of the day, average people are going to be the ones that are going to have to pay for all this. Because they always, always do.
Porter Collins: (It's 32. 32.)
Danny Moses: (It's fucking tanked, man.)
Mark Baum: That's my two cents, thank you. [Sits down]
Porter Collins: (Let me drop a deuce on Deutsche).
Debate host: Does our bull have a response?
Bruce Miller: Only that, in the entire history of Wall Street, no investment bank has ever failed unless caught in criminal activities. So, yes, I stand by my Bear Stearns optimism.
Man in crowd: Mr. Miller, I'm sorry, quick question. From the time you guys started talking, Bear Stearns stock has fallen more than 38%. [People in the crowd start murmuring in surprise] Would you still buy more?
Bruce Miller: [Trying to be optimistic] Y-yeah, sure...of course I'd buy more. Why not?
Mark Baum: BOOM.

Share this quote on facebook Charlie Geller: [As he and Jamie look around in the abandoned trading floor of Lehman Brothers after its collapse] This isn't how I pictured it.
Jamie Shipley: What'd you think we'd find?
Charlie Geller: I don't know...Grownups.

Share this quote on facebook Stanley Wong - Ted Jiang

Share this quote on facebook Jeffry Griffin - Chris