I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry (2007)

Share this quote on facebook Gentlemen, I have a very simple policy. What you shove up your ass is your own business.

Share this quote on facebook Whenever, whatever. That's the code.

Share this quote on facebook [When Chuck says he and Larry have always been together, in reference to their shifts in the fire department] So were my balls. Now I only have one of them.

Share this quote on facebook If these two men are gay then I'm a one-legged parrot. Anybody see me with a crutch and a cracker?

Share this quote on facebook And most importantly, they showed us that no matter whom we choose to love, be they heterosexual, homosexual, asexual, bisexual, trisexual, quadrisexual, pansexual, transexual, omnisexual or that thing where the chick ties the belt around your neck and tinkles on a ballon, it has absolutely nothing to do with who we are as people.

Share this quote on facebook [They are both injured from an accident on the job. They are both in hospital beds]
Larry: Chuck. What's going on, man?
Chuck: Brace yourself, Larry. What I'm gonna tell you is pretty rough. They removed your entire body. You're nothing but a head now.
Larry: What?
Chuck: They said that there was enough fat in your head to rebuild you a new body, so they got scientists in the other room working on it. God willing, you're gonna be alright.
Larry: Oh, you know, you're such a dick.

Share this quote on facebook Larry: Domestic partnership.
Chuck: Domestic partnership? You mean like faggots?
Larry: No, I mean yeah. But no, not us. Obviously, just on paper.
Chuck: Paper faggots?
Larry: Well, the accepted vernacular is "gay"... but yes.

Share this quote on facebook Chuck: What do you got?
Larry: Maxi Pads.
Chuck: What, do we have vaginas now? Put it back!

Share this quote on facebook Chuck: The only thing I'm doing with my eyes is putting a bag over your head, you toothless moron!

Share this quote on facebook Kevin: Yeah, yeah! Gay love!

Share this quote on facebook Asian Minister: Now place the ring on his hand. A ring is like a circle, it goes on forever. It's not like a triangle, triangle have corners. It's like a circle.

Share this quote on facebook Kevin: Hey, apple dumpling. What's crack-a-lacking?

Share this quote on facebook Chuck: I'm not an animal! I'm a whore!

Share this quote on facebook [Chuck and Larry are being harassed by homophoic protestors]
Protestor: [to Chuck] Faggot!
Chuck: What did you call me?
Protestor: Faggot.
[Chuck punches the protestor out]
Chuck: The accepted vernacular is "gay"!

Share this quote on facebook Eric: What happened to your place?
Chuck: Uh... Roaches. Yeah, big giant roaches. They ate my dog.
Tori: Bastards.
Larry: Language!
Eric: Roaches are so eewwy!
Chuck: Did ya here that? Roaches are eewwy.
Larry: 'Eewwy' is another word not allowed said in this house. Okay?
Chuck: I think eewwys a nice word.
Larry: Shut up.
Chuck: Eewwy!

Share this quote on facebook They're as straight as can be, but don't tell anyone.

Share this quote on facebook How far would you go for a friend?

Share this quote on facebook Chuck has just found the perfect girl. Too bad he's agreed to marry his best friend.

Share this quote on facebook Cole Morgen as Eric Valentine, Larry’s son and Chuck’s stepson

Share this quote on facebook Shelby Adamowsky as Tori Valentine, Larry’s daughter and Chuck’s stepdaughter

Share this quote on facebook Arne Starr as Court Supporter (uncredited)